Pink Eye

I alluded to this personal hygiene disaster in a previous post, so I figured I should share the entire story. A few weeks ago, I woke up with my right eye sealed shut with a crusty yellow discharge. I hopped in the shower, scrubbed my face clean and went to work. Although my eye was itchy and bloodshot, I simply attributed it to some seasonal allergies.

As soon as I awoke the next morning, I KNEW something was seriously wrong. I struggled to open my eyes, and could feel and smell a thick crust on my eyes and cheeks. I stumbled towards the bathroom mirror and was shocked, horrified, and embarrassed. I HAD PINK EYE. There was NO WAY I could pull this off at work. My colleagues would either figure out that I had pink eye or would assume that I came to work under the influence…both completely unacceptable options for an university administrator.

I washed my hands every time I used the restroom and wasn’t one to haphazardly shake hands with people. My contact with young children was pretty minimal and I wiped down my desk, keyboard, and mouse at least once a week. If I took all of these proactive measures, how did this happen? How did I get my own or someone else’s shit in my eye!? As I did a mental rundown of my day and nights, I suddenly realized that there was a part of nightly routine that likely resulted in my current demise…it was the late night diaper change.

Here’s how it normally happened:

1. I’m fast asleep.
2. My wife pokes/pushes me to check on our crying daughter.
3. I wake up and stumble down the hallway to reach our daughter’s room.
4. I change her diaper, give her a bottle, and tuck her back into the crib.

It got to the point where I was able to do this routine in under 5 minutes. More often than not, I’d run into a poop filled diaper as well. It was dark, I was tired, and I rarely washed my hands unless I knew I got some stuff on my hands…and I paid dearly for this.

After swallowing my pride, I went to a doctor. After being lectured about personal hygiene for about 15 minutes, I was given eye drops and sent on my way.


In closing, Smokey would remind everyone that “Only you can prevent pink eye!”

About Andre Moore (109 Articles)
Atlanta based Food Writer, Essayist, Hunter/Angler, and World Traveler. I create meaningful experiences for my family and write about it.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: